Kinky Chats with R.B. O’Brien

R.B. O'brien, BDSM Writers Con, Charley Ferrer, kink
R.B. O’Brien is nominated for the
Golden Flogger Award 2016 for her book, Redemption.

Check out what she had to say about writing
BDSM romance and more…

 

Why did you begin writing BDSM novels?
I began to really write my novels after my first year of full-time teaching. I had time on my hands in the summer, real uninterrupted time, and I had been dabbling on and off with writing for as long as I can remember. Most of the stories in my head were just that, stories. As I woke each morning, my fingers would begin their tap, tap, tap, and quite honestly, I rarely knew what I wrote until the sun was setting sometimes. Showers…meals… had almost been forgotten. When I was done, I had what was called Natalie’s Edge. What I didn’t realize at the time was that much of it came from my personal experiences and my subconscious that had lain dormant.

Redemption, the third in the series, came from a very different place. Like the protagonist Natalie, I too became invested in a journey of self-discovery. Why was I the way I was? Why did I have this void deep within me that didn’t seem like it could ever be filled? This deep desire for something that seemed so wrong or abnormal? I began to ask myself questions. I began to research more. I began to talk to those who practiced the lifestyle. And I realized I wasn’t all that different. That I wasn’t so abnormal and that my attraction to D/s and BDSM might be the exact cause for the deep void I felt. I thought writing would cure the void, and it did. For a spell.

And then I met someone special. For a brief period of about six months, I lived the lifestyle. And answers came to me about my true self.

Redemption is loosely based on that experience, about finding not kink but a true bond, finding that one, that person that understands the dynamic, the lifestyle, the care and trust and commitment that goes into both dominance and submission. BDSM done right has a true beauty in it found in nothing else in life. It was beautiful for a time for me. It was also painful. And it has ended.

The Natalie’s Edge series is fiction. The story is filled with flawed characters that do not necessarily present BDSM idyllically at first, especially in the first two books but who come to terms with acceptance through self-discovery, courage, and above all, love.

Redemption, though BDSM-themed, is a romance first and foremost and follows that trope. It presents twists and turns that the reader, who had been along for the journey of Natalie and Michael from the beginning, may not expect. It showcases that some of us come from damaged places that may have even drawn us to the BDSM lifestyle, but at the end of it all, if we face our demons, if we embrace who we are, that if we can accept who we are and find trust in another person, love is real and magical, and the greatest of all bonds can be realized. To me, that is what Redemption is all about. That even the imperfect can find happiness if they are brave enough to do so.

What is the hardest part of writing your novel?
Ha! The hardest part is finding the quiet time to write. Presently, I am working on a darker romance, BDSM-themed but not the kind I wrote about in Natalie’s Edge.

I can’t just write a little each day like many writers. I have to sequester myself for long periods of time. I have to travel into the world, immerse myself as if I’m actually living it myself. I have to become lost in my imagination and in the minds of my characters. I often tell people that I live two lives. My waking world and the world of my writing. If I don’t find that place, that quiet spot in my mind to let the world exist, it simply doesn’t come together for me. Again, because I teach, I get long stretches where I can do that.

I hope to get back to that over the holiday break. But truthfully, once I immerse, I have yet to hit writer’s block. I knock on wood as I say that! Writing is as natural as breathing is for me.

Will you be attending BDSM Writers Con or other events we can meet you at?
Anonymity is paramount to me because of my day profession. Therefore, until the mainstream can begin to accept sexuality more, especially in America, never mind sexuality that includes elements of BDSM, I doubt I will ever be able to fully embrace being a writer publicly.

I must write what I feel and love for it to be authentic. This is what comes naturally to me. THIS is what I love to write. And I never want to write for any other reason than for the love of it. Without that, it’s meaningless.

But would I still love to attend the conference? You bet!

How do I make that happen? New York City is right down the street from me. Perhaps if I wear a mask and a wig?



Comments

Kinky Chats with R.B. O’Brien — 17 Comments

  1. These sound like a great read! I’m currently working on my first novel, a polyamourous romance. I know what you mean trying to fit writing in around everyday life so I’m hoping I can get at least half the book finished before I go back to work

  2. Congratulations! I am so happy for you! You have a great series! I have them, but just wanted to tell you what a wonderful interview. Good luck with the nominee!

  3. I read a variety of genre’s and I read many, many books. I have to say, RB O’Brien has become one of my favorite Authors. Her writing is fresh, sharp and full of creative nuances. Everything I always look for in a good book. Good luck with your nomination Miss O an keep writing. It will be a sin if a new book does not see the light early in the year.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Are you human? * Time limit is exhausted. Please reload CAPTCHA.